The Goldie Standard: A Novel

Hilarious and surprising, this unapologetically Jewish story delivers a present-day take on a highly creative grandmother trying to find her Ph.D granddaughter a husband who is a doctor—with a yarmulke, of course. 

Goldie Mandell is opinionated, assertive, and stuck in an Assisted Living Facility. But even surrounded by schleppers with walkers, pictures of sunrises, fancy fish tanks, and an array of daily activities to complement the tepid tea and stale cookies on offer, her salt-free plate is full. She’s got a granddaughter to settle, an eager love interest named Harry to subdue, and precious memories of her happy marriage to fellow Holocaust survivor Mordy to draw upon. 

Maxie Jacobson is young, brilliant, and newly single, not by choice. But she’s got her science career, a grandmother to care for, and her whole life ahead of her. When Maxie takes on the role of her grandmother’s medical advocate, she has no idea Goldie operates with the single purpose of securing Maxie with Dr. Right. Instead, Maxie is distracted by her grandmother’s unexpectedly charming long-haired, sandal-wearing, peculiarly-named driver, T-Jam Bin Naumann, definitely wrong in every way. 

About Simi Monheit

Born and raised in Brooklyn, Simi Monheit calls Northern California home. Simi is a graduate of Stanford’s Online Novel Writing Certificate program, has a Master’s degree in Computer Science and an undergraduate degree in English. She started writing after a career in technology. Her work has appeared in JewishFiction.net, The Forward, Moment, Chautauqua, HerStry, Pacifica Literary Review and Lilith Magazine. Simi most recently was a Pushcart Prize nominee (2020), placed in the 2O20 Writer’s Digest literary fiction short story contest, and even won the 2022 Pacifica Literary Review bodice ripper contest.

Praise for Simi Monheit's The Goldie Standard: A Novel

“Simi Monheit’s genius is to slowly reveal the complexity behind a stereotype. In Goldie Mandell, we have a new Jewish heroine—acerbic without bitterness, tender without sentimentality. 'Who knew what I had to say was so interesting?' says one of the most memorable characters in contemporary Jewish fiction. A book of pure delight.”

—Yossi Klein Halevi, author of Like Dreamers, winner of the Jewish Book Council’s Everett Book of the Year Award

“An aged Jewish woman kvetches her way toward love while solving everyone else’s problems in Monheit’s bittersweet comic novel. Goldie is a spellbinding protagonist, full of dudgeon and crabby insights into all things newfangled. Monheit’s sparkling prose poetically and humorously conveys the collision of romantic dreams with crotchety reality. A hilarious saga of family renewal and last-chance romance that plucks the heartstrings.

—Kirkus Reviews (starred review)

“Monheit has the real deal knack of bringing her characters to life with the most surprising, charming, and readable voices. Goldie is a protagonist who will stay with me for a long time: a friend, a mentor, a pleasure.”

—Josh Mohr, author of Model Citizen and Damascus

“This delightful, insightful debut novel crackles with the different ways to love and the many ways to harm. At its center, the flawed, fierce, and marvelous Goldie Mandell—a Jewish child wrenched from Nazi Germany; a young woman wildly in love; a mother and grandmother thick with love and regrets; and a hard-headed guardian of history, identity, tradition, and family. The Goldie Standard is a tragicomic balm against a too-often inhumane world rife with incalculable suffering that ultimately sends up a rally cry for togetherness, for grace, for peace, for being fully, majestically alive.”

—Ethel Rohan, author of Sing, I

“Simi Monheit has created a novel that is alternately hilarious and heartbreaking, a tour de force about the weight of generational trauma. Goldie is one of the most unforgettable characters I’ve encountered in years, and Monheit does an amazing job of capturing this elderly Holocaust survivor’s voice as she reminisces about the past while scheming to find her granddaughter a nice doctor for a husband. The way that Monheit weaves between Goldie’s life and that of her equally wonderful granddaughter’s—and between past and present—is nothing short of masterful. We need this novel right now, to shine a light into the darkness and remind us that of the transcendent power of love.”

—Malena Watrous, author of You Follow Me; Lead Instructor for Stanford Continuing Studies Novel Certificate

“Can you have an acerbic yet golden heart? Oh yes, you can, as Simi Monheit proves in her compassionate, compelling and comedic debut, The Goldie Standard. While this novel reads like a romantic caper, Monheit doesn’t shy away from examining the most fraught of our human complexities. Much like her main character, Goldie, Monheit’s magic lies in her ability to touch the tenderest of heart strings while tickling all the funny bones. Another bit of magic? No one can live up to The Goldie Standard, and then, somehow, everyone does.”

—R. Cathey Daniels, Author of Live Caught

“How to describe The Goldie Standard? Wry, certainly, but also incisive, assertive, and deliciously uncompromising in the voice Monheit creates. But most importantly, necessary: this book is a beautiful reminder that it is never too late to come to ourselves, to allow love to expand the borders of who and what we think we are, and ultimately, to let go of our incessant need for control and let life happen. In Goldie’s continual unfolding, and in her resistance to it, Monheit excavates an authentic expression of how the self can be reclaimed.”

—Matt Muth, Editor-In-Chief, Pacifica Literary Review

“Great novels need great characters, and in Goldie Mandell, Simi Monheit has created someone so indelible and so alive that I half expected her to leap from the pages into the real world. A generational story, a romantic comedy of errors, and a wise examination of the human heart, The Goldie Standard succeeds on all levels—and is a debut novel that readers won’t soon forget."

—Martin Wilson, author of What They Always Tell Us

“The Goldie Standard reads like a love letter to the generation of holocaust survivors mostly gone. Yet Monheit’s affection for her characters never precludes portraying them as less than perfect—we get to know the mishpocha, warts and all. Goldie lets no one off the hook —she’s got opinions about everyone but manages to keep it to herself. Lucky for us that we are privy to her thoughts and opinions—because they’re brutal—and funny as hell. Goldie and her family are people we know—brought to life in a riveting story of love, loyalty, trust and taking chances. It’s a story that weaves the joys and the trauma of the past with the challenges of today. Goldie, the consummate survivor, must learn to deal with the 'new ways' of her children and granddaughter. Having been a stranger in a strange land herself, she is nonetheless confused—yet intrigued—by a 'different' newcomer to the family circle. I loved watching the characters enfold and grow —and truly didn’t want the book to end. Sequel?”

—Mindy Berkowitz; Retired CEO, Jewish Family Services of Silicon Valley

“Goldie is the Bubbie we all wish we had. Poignant and funny, Monheit captures the vagaries of aging and the folly of youth. A great inter-generational ride.”

—Moshe Waldoks, co-editor of The Big Book of Jewish Humor

“Simi Monheit’s The Goldie Standard captures life in all its facets. At its heart, it is a love story—love for family, friends, the world, and one’s self. Monheit captures voices in such a way that the world fades away and the reader is there with Goldie and Maxine through times of sorrow, challenge, and joy. This multi-layered story keeps the reader engaged and waiting to see what will happen next.”

—Jill Gerard, Editor, Chautauqua

“The Goldie Standard is a Shabbat banquet of Jewish love that Simi Monheit skillfully braids like a challah. From her assisted living home, Goldie Mandel is the every-bubbe who beams affection—and opinion—into her relationships with her daughters, granddaughter, beloved husband of blessed memory, and a new love. Her efforts to make a shidduch for granddaughter Maxie are soon foiled by a quirky newcomer. Monheit’s charming and engaging story is a delight from start to finish.”

—Pam Janis, Contributing Editor, Moment Magazine

“Warning—you’re about to fall in love with a vivid cast of characters who will live in your head long after you've reached the last page. For me this was a story of the way family and their traumas can shape us, and the power of love to heal it all. Funny, poignant and thoughtful—I'm enamored of The Goldie Standard.”

—Samantha Dunn, journalist and author of Not By Accident: Reconstructing a Careless Life